Blessings of Friendship

Background Scripture: 1 Kings 5; 2 Chronicles 2
Lesson Scripture: 1 Kings 5:1–12

Introduction

For the next three months in Sunday school, we will be learning from a cast of secondary characters how God worked with his chosen people. We will study about Solomon, Elijah, Elisha, Ahab, Hezekiah, Asa, Jehoshaphat, and Manasseh. While these are not unfamiliar names, they are not as well known as other heroes of the Old Testament.

From the heights of King Solomon’s glory to the depths of Manassah’s depravity, God endeavored to establish, lead, and preserve the kingdoms of Judah and Israel. He had mixed results. Some leaders listened; others took their own way, affected by the temptations common to man.

When a God-fearing king reigned, the people were obedient subjects and blessings followed. Unfortunately, such seasons were few, especially in the northern kingdom of Israel. Judah generally fared better, and usually this depended on the sincerity and devotion of the king. Does that pattern still prevail today?

The prophets Elijah and Elisha were faithful witnesses to the truth in difficult times. Both men performed notable miracles that testify of God’s providence to those who remain faithful to Him under test.

What can we learn from these ancient accounts? We know that principles are timeless, God is unchanging, and that faithfulness is still rewarded. Our rewards are not measured by financial largesse, as in Solomon’s court, but in the inner blessings of peace, security, and contentment of heart and soul.

We also know that the Evil One still deceives and destroys. But as Manasseh’s life displays, when a great sinner repents, he can still become a force for good. Redemption remains the theme of the ages, and God still performs miracles for those who believe.

Blessings of Friendship

Lesson 1

September 6, 2020

Background Scripture: 1 Kings 5; 2 Chronicles 2

Lesson Scripture: 1 Kings 5:1–12

Introduction

God created Adam and said it was not good for him to be alone. As social creatures, we find fulfillment in relating to other people as friends. These relationships help us find meaning in life.

We should not take our friends for granted. One song writer described it this way: “But I don’t know a thing in this whole wide world that’s worse than being alone.” 1 When we go through a valley of disappointment, just to know that someone cares brings us hope. Conversely, when we feel isolated, a small trial can become a bitter experience. Jesus is a friend that “sticketh closer than a brother” (Prov. 18:24), but we also need to establish, maintain, and value human friendships. In addition to the Bible and the Holy Spirit, God uses our friends to teach us about Himself as well as about our own self.

Key Verse

Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not; neither go into thy brother’s house in the day of thy calamity: for better is a neighbour that is near than a brother far off (Prov. 27:10).

Lesson Scripture

Studying the Lesson

The relationship between Solomon and Hiram was more than a political and commercial alliance. Hiram was ever a lover of David. Perhaps he had a deep respect for God as he saw David’s devotion. When Solomon extended an invitation to Hiram to be involved in building God’s house, he was ready to help. In a similar manner, as we put God first in our lives, we will bring a blessing to our friends.

In true friendship there are costs as well as benefits to both parties. Relationships grow deeper as we reciprocate love and exchange advice. We allow our friends to know our strengths and weaknesses. We trust that our friends “have our backs” and want them to know we care about their welfare. When we are not able to trust someone, it limits our friendship.

We learn from the lesson text how the friendship of David and Hiram continued to bear fruit between Hiram and Solomon. Although time has a way of changing circumstances, true friendships weather these changes. Occasionally we receive a warm acknowledgement from someone who tells us, “I was friends with your parents” We then benefit from a friendship our parents enjoyed.

Practical Truths for Today

We find it meaningful that Jesus addressed his disciples as friends when He instructed them before his trial and crucifixion (John 15:13–16). Jesus made a distinction between servants and friends. Though a servant and his master have a different social status, a Christian master and his servant should be able to be friends.

When we come to God in repentance, He wants to be our friend. Satan would make us feel resentful that we must surrender our will, but God knows that in surrender we find true happiness. The Lord is complete without our friendship, but He wants our friendship because He loves us. Our friendship with God is unique because in human friendships we need each other.

We find commonalities as we mingle with others. We may have family ties, share an occupation, or come from the same neighborhood. We may have common interests, experiences, or challenges. These things can be catalysts for friendship. Though our human friendships may not have the depth of Christian fellowship, they should be a means of showing the love of God to others. Christian fellowship relates to things of eternal value. As we become the friend of God, this relationship becomes a foundation for all our human friendships. Someone who has Jesus as his best friend finds his human friendships very meaningful. The deeper the friendship the easier the self-denial.

Jesus invites us to take his yoke upon us (Matt. 11:29). As we bear the yoke of Jesus, He inspires us to be friendly and gives grace and strength to be unselfish in our human relationships. We need to carry this yoke into our marriage, home, occupation, and all other relationships. Although the apostle Paul instructed us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Cor. 6:14), he did not mean that we should avoid unbelievers; rather, in being their friend we must keep our friendship with God the priority. We can then be a true friend to everyone.

How true a friend are you? How true are your friends? Should we compromise our convictions to gain human acceptance? We may hold others at arm’s length, fearing to trust them lest they hurt us. We may exclude people because of supposed personality clashes. Sometimes we say about someone, “I just can’t stand him.” Perhaps we want friends but are so wrapped up in ourselves that we fail to take an honest interest in others. We can betray a friend’s trust or be manipulative, leaving a friend feeling used. Sometimes we leave our friends feeling neglected, or we may break our promises. We should pray God to help us avoid these selfish mistakes so that we can experience true friendship. And, more importantly, we need a genuine relationship with Jesus so that we have power, grace, and understanding to be a true friend.

How do we measure the value of a true friend? There are “fair weather” friends, and then there are friends who will stand by us in a storm. In seeking our favor, some friends tell us what we want to hear, and others are true friends who tell us what we need to hear. Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” True friendship is not based upon needing friends to use for selfish reasons or upon needing friends to satisfy one’s ego. Selflessness found in surrender to Christ is the foundation of true friendship.

Jesus said, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13), which is what Jesus did by dying on the cross. We are not likely to actually give our life for someone today, but we follow Jesus’s example when we give ourselves for the spiritual care of our brethren. When we were baptized, we promised to reprove our spiritual brethren when they would do wrong and to accept reproof from them when we fail. By this we are figuratively laying down our lives for our brethren.

“By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another” (John 13:35). For our love to be perfect, we need to become vulnerable to our spiritual brethren, laying down our fear of being hurt. We are not sufficient of ourselves; we need the brotherhood. As members of the bride of Christ, we find security and fellowship, which David likened to “the precious ointment upon the head” and to “the dew that descended upon the mountains of Zion” (Ps. 133:2–3).

Questions

1. What are ways to help introverts become more outgoing?
2. What are some practical ways to cultivate true friendship?
3. What is the appropriate response to a friendship that leaves you feeling used?
4. 1 Mosie Lister (1921–2015), “Where No One Stands Alone”
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Source: COGICM Daily Bible Readings (Daily Bible Readings, PO Box 124, Glenn, CA 95943).